Random Thoughts on Kindness and Compassion

“Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?”
-Henry David Thoreau
In January a friend of mine lost her husband quite suddenly to cancer. He was a great father and husband and left behind my friend and their four children. It is really hard to imagine losing your spouse, your best friend. She is sad and hurting but a really amazing mom. She holds it together amazingly well despite her pain. In April my nephew passed away. He was only 16 and it was very unexpected. As you can imagine it has been very devastating for the entire family. And it hard as it has been for all of us our grief is only but a fraction that my sister and brother in law are feeling. I just wish I could make them feel better. It is really hard to see them hurting.

I really cannot imagine the pain my friend and sister & brother in law are feeling. It is very hard to wrap my mind around that kind of grief. I am not lying when I say that I think about both these families daily. It is very bizarre that you got about your day...business as usual and meanwhile others are having to endure the most traumatic of events.

I used to work with this gal that everyone thought was so rude. People would talk about her behind her back. Come to find out, she was living with domestic violence. At one point I had a coworker that always seemed distracted. People would talk about her because they felt like they had to pick up her slack. Turns out, she was dealing with a teenage daughter addicted to heroin. I mean, you just never know what someone else is going through.

Everyone has different struggles and we live in this society of go-go-go and busy-busy-busy. Everyone always seems to be in such a hurry and annoyed. People just seem to lack compassion these days. We should all stop once and a while and remember that people have different struggles in their lives and we should try to keep that in mind at all times. It would not hurt us to be a little kinder to each other and have some more compassion.

I have been thinking about this a lot lately but I really have not been able to put it into words. I came across the following video on Facebook it really spoke to me. I instantly thought of my sister & brother in law and my friend.



I know I am kind of all over the place with this post. I guess my point is to be kind to each other. You just never know what the person next to you is dealing with. Kindness is always free and just takes a second.

Big changes going on in our household

I quit my second job. I know it was only one day a week but it was becoming too much. My mental health was more important and when I feel ready I will write about that too. Anyway, that chapter is closed for now. My "big girl" job is mentally draining. I love it, don't get me wrong. But it is a difficult job. Plus, I am a mom and that is a full time job too. And I know that having five children is not really considered a large family in the large family world but for me, it is a large family. I love my kids and would not change a thing...heck I would even add one more if I could. But managing five children is a challenge for me. Working 6 days a week was too difficult for me. I had to move on.

And the biggest change is that Conor starts a new daycare tomorrow. This was something we always planned on. My 8 year old (my Bear) attended this preschool/daycare from age 3-5 and we loved it. Sadly, they stopped taking babies a couple years ago so we were not able to start Conor there when we needed daycare. We found a back up solution knowing we would switch him around age one. We got to bypass the waiting list and get him as soon as his first birthday rolled around. I am thrilled, it is an outstanding Montessori daycare/school and we had the best experience with our Bear. BUT...I am feeling so guilty about changing up his routine. I feel terrible about putting him through this transition even though I know it will be fine. Even though I knew this was the plan all along, I can't help but feel worried about the whole situation. I just hope he adjusts easily and quickly.

Wish us luck.

Keep Calm...

Someday I hope my skill matches my passion

My life recently as told through my phone camera...

Once 4:25pm rolls around at work I am already packed and ready to go!

One of Conor's birthday gifts...really I wanted them for ME.

His favorite birthday gift

My 8 year old loved this gift as well...

I was a lazy mom at least once this week and fed my kids junk

My sister gave me a cute beer koozie. We are classy around here. ;)

I attempted an ombre cake

DH and I made TJ's run...I swear we are not alcoholics, just cheap.

Almost a Pinterest fail...

I was determined to make a simple ombre cake. Just a simple 3 layer cake and mini cake for Conor. My first mistake was not making my own icing. It is so warm here and the icing was oozing everywhere. It was a mess. But in the end it was a semi success and actually tasted good.

Conor was totally overwhelmed with all the singing so he freaked out an started crying. Poor kiddo.

Happy birthday to my littlest love...

Exactly one year ago today, at 11:35pm my sweet unexpected blessing entered the world. I really cannot believe just how fast this year has gone by. He really is a joy to have in our lives. He is the best gift that I never knew I wanted. I love you with all my heart sweet Conor Knox.

Please excuse the quality of these pictures. My camera was broken and I relied on my crappy phone until receiving my dslr in December.

This little gem goes out to any BBC mommas that might stumble across my blog...Conor and a Llama.

Project 52-Week 28

This picture is not really special as far as composition goes. I am working on editing right now so that was the focus. This was shot during a harsh time of the day so the pictures were way overexposed. Also, I have officially weaned myself to RAW files only. For now Lightroom is much easier for me to navigate than Photoshop but I hope to learn both, eventually.

Week 28
My sweet five-some

And in other news...THIS IS MY 100th POST!!

One year ago today...

One year ago today was Conor's due date. Now, I know that babies come when they want but I am not going to lie...I was bummed that on my due date I had zero signs of impending labor. Here is what a wrote about my 40 week check up a year ago:

"I was 4cm and 70% when he checked me prior to sweeping my membranes. My OB told me not to bother making another appointment and he said I would most likely go within 36 hours. He is not one to say stuff like that so I had all sorts of hope. Especially being 40 weeks and 4cm. I thought would be a good combo for membrane sweeping.

I was contracting most of the evening (true, painful contractions) and they went from about 5 minutes apart to really irregular and they finally pooped out at around 2am. I bled most of the evening (my OB said I would). I woke up to my stupid alarm summoning me for work at 6am. I so bummed about sitting at work right now. I have had not one contraction, not even a BH all day. Ugh. If I did not need to save every bit of leave, I would be at home feeling sorry for myself right now."

Don't you just hate those "vote for me" posts? This is one of those posts...

Please vote for little baby Conor in the BabyPalooza contest.

You can vote for him HERE.

We sure would appreciate your vote. My sister lives in the San Diego area and it sure would be nice to win a trip to visit her. Plus, Conor is one of the cutest babies in NM but I suppose I may be biased. Anyway, you can vote daily (one email address per day) and round one ends Friday. Only the top 125 babies will make it to round two.

This is the picture I chose to enter, I was going for personality and cuteness.

Thank you for your support!

My life recently as told through my phone camera...

I am going to try this whole "My life recently as told through my phone camera..." every Monday but you know how that goes. I am going to try my hardest to keep up though.

This week...

Oh my lambs, this sweet face melts my heart

There were 4th of July festivities

Conor and I took a selfie

We went to pool party/team meeting (football starts in 2 weeks!!)

The husby and I had a late night Target run

The husby and I tried a new beer

There was trip to urgent care :( for sweet baby Conor (Ear infection, he is better-ish)

And that was my life this week in a nutshell.

My baby is super cute and has great musical taste

Let me apologize in advance for the poor video quality. But my baby is super cute and has some awesome moves along with kickass musical taste.

Project 52-Week 27

My first attempt at long exposure photography

Week 27

Watermelon makes everything better. And also Ibuprofen.

Today I decided to work even though pretty much everyone else in my office took the day off. It was kind of depressing because there was like 10 of us in the whole building. I got a lot of work done so it was worth it. Plus I am banking my leave for October because my mom is visiting for the Balloon Fiesta. But I got a call from daycare letting me know the baby was running a fever. :( My poor little guy. I picked him up and spent the afternoon snuggling him. He was pretty miserable so I went ahead and gave him some Motrin. He perked up for a bit and ate some watermelon for dinner. And he loved it.

He is sleeping well now. We are just trying to keep him comfortable and hydrated. I feel so helpless when my kiddos are sick :(. I hope he feels better soon.

Happy 4th of July!

My life recently as told through my phone camera...

We recently sold one of our cars so we are in the midst of car shopping. Our family car is a Suburban because, well I have a million kids so I need seating and tons of cargo space. But we are not millionares so we need a smaller car that is good on gas as well. Prior to the Suburban owned a Volvo XC90. I loved that car. It had the seating but not the cargo so we traded it in...I still miss it. It was all kinds of awesome. *sniff* I really want another but it is out of my budget for a second car. Boo, hiss! Anyway car shopping sucks. A lot. Car shopping creates all sorts of unnecessary anxiety for me. I told my husband to just buy something and bring it home so I do not have to deal with it.

The other day at work this roadrunner came up to a group us while we were on our break. They are not usually this brave. Only in the desert...meep meep!!

Baby Conor got some cool new kicks (is it still cool to say kicks?).

Please explain to me how one small baby can make this mess in a matter of 5 minutes?

Mmmm...beer...

I have been stressed lately. My sweet husband surprised me with a new Pandora charm. He is a keeper.

All week long I had to wake up my sweet boy at 7am in order to get him ready for daycare. Saturday...he was up at 5:30am. WTF? So we took advantage of the early morning and took the baby out on a breakfast date.

That is life lately as told through my phone camera.